Forty

Today I turn forty. That feels strange to write. A round number, a heavy one. My birthday has always been a built-in checkpoint—falling on the 1st of November means the year is almost done, and looking back has become a bit of a ritual. But this year, the reflection feels sharper. Maybe because forty isn’t just another candle on the cake, it’s a statement. A reminder that I’m no longer “on the way there”. I’m here, fully present in the time I’m living.

Fatherhood keeps being the best part of all this. Watching Lavinia grow into herself is like seeing a new story written each day—sometimes a comedy, sometimes a drama, always worth the ticket. She’s turning into this person who surprises me constantly, and I can’t help but feel proud, often multiple times a day. The moments we laugh together, or when she shows me something I never taught her but she figured out on her own, are the things that make the rest of life, with all its deadlines and detours, fall into perspective. And through it all, Stef is right there, endlessly patient. The constant that makes everything else make sense.

Two days before my 40th birthday, Lavinia turned 6. I like how this Instagram carousel framed it: at this point the way children see their dads evolves from The Playmate to The Standard. From the tickle monster, the one who makes everyday life feel like an adventure, to the blueprint they’ll use for treating strangers, handling mistakes, practicing kindness, patience, and self-respect. That shift arrived at the perfect time in my own journey. As she develops curiosity and confidence, and I deepen perspective and presence, I’m learning that fatherhood isn’t about wishing time would slow down, it’s about moving with it, while leading the way.

Work this year has been a rollercoaster. I started 2025 on the hunt, landed a position in a media company, then decided to move again, back into the AI B2B space. The type of work that excites me even when it exhausts me. It’s messy at times, sure, but also thrilling. It’s great to build something where the ground shifts every week. Yet I’d be lying if I said I didn’t sometimes wish I were more present for the people around me, especially when the work chaos bleeds into my mind during evenings or weekends.

I’m in the final stretch of my MBA. All the modules are behind me; it’s just the dissertation now, which sounds deceptively singular, like one big paper you knock out in a few days. In reality, it looms like a mountain—always there, always waiting. But progress is steady, and I like not having constant short-term deadlines anymore. The air feels lighter, even if the climb isn’t over yet. I started this MBA at a time when life seemed to be settling into autopilot—married, with a child, a house, a car. It was almost like life was saying “you worked for this, now enjoy it”. But I can’t sit still without challenges. There’s always going to be a “next”, and that’s how I like it.

Writing has been a revelation. Not just the dissertation, but proper writing—here, on this site, and in places I once thought out of reach. This year my name appeared in outlets as high-profile as the Financial Times. For someone who’s been eyeing that kind of publications since his late teens, it’s surreal. Back then, I wanted to write but let’s face it—I had little to say. Now, with a few years in the rear-view mirror, there’s more substance. Turns out, you need a bit of mileage before your voice carries. And writing—when it works—feels like building a bridge between past me, who only dreamed of it, and present me, who can finally sit down and put the words together.

Life is far from perfect, but it’s good. I feel lucky: to have my family, to be working on things that challenge me, to be finishing something as demanding as an MBA while still laughing daily with my daughter. As I step into this new decade, I’m walking forward with awareness. Aware of where I am. Aware of what matters. Aware that time—like Lavinia’s growth, like work deadlines, like the changing seasons—doesn’t pause, so neither should I.

So forty doesn’t scare me. It feels like the right number for this moment. Heavy, yes, but also strong. I’m entering it with open eyes, steady steps, and genuine excitement for what’s next.

Previous birthday / yearly posts: 39 (2024), 38 (2023), 37 (2022), 36 (2021), 35 (2020), 2018, 2017 resolutions, 2016 social media wishlist, 2014.